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Paul Verhoeven makes sloppy movies, but he fills them with stuff that you can't ignore. Starship Troopers, if you're only looking for an action movie, is pretty weak. Showgirls, if you're just looking for titillation, is pretty weak. And Robocop, if you're after nothing but explosions... well, it's pretty decent. But none of these films would have been anything more than run of the mill mid-budget successes if not for the fact that Verhoeven infuses each of his films with a strong message. In fact, in two of those three examples, the message made the movie.

Starship Troopers pointed to our society as a messed up morass of people waving the flag as they seek to destroy the enemy, for no real reason more than bravado and nationalistic machismo. Robocop pointed to our increasing reliance on corproations and the outsourcing of government work to those only interested in making money, who would then betray us and enslave us to suit themselves. Showgirls... well, Showgirls showed the world that America is a prudish nation that fears the boob more than the bomb.

All three, in hindsight, mean more today than they did when they were shot. All three, in hindsight, were incredible successes, having earned a fortune on DVD and vido. And all three took a pounding from critics.

"My friends call me Murphy. You call me... Robocop."

So now we have Robocop 3. You'll recall that in the first film, the dreaded OCP created Robocop to phase out the less efficient, more expensive human police force, only for Robo's human parts to take over and go after the bad guys. In Robocop 2, OCP put together a new Robocop model containing the brain of a drug-addicted manaiac, and the two slugged it out with original Robo coming up trumps. In this one, the Robocops are pretty much old news, having been put into mothballs, so now OCP has been taken over by a Japanese mogul who wants to kick the population of part of Old Detroit out, knock down their homes and gentrify everything. So Robo comes back to kick more ass.

What makes this film worth checking out is that it understands the mentality of the first film. There's more message here, though it's hardly an original one, and there's a good amount of humor to go along with it. Sadly, the best of the humor comes in spikes that make you laugh out loud, then the screenplay goes back to awful dialogue, formula plotline and action that really doesn't trip the audience's trigger.

It does, however, feature an all-star cast, though most of the names in the film were not even close to being names when the film was made. Robert John Burke, who you'll recognize if you watch a lot of Hal Hartley films (he was the monster in No Such Thing, and one of the leads in the vastly underappreciated Simple Men) turns up as the replacement for Peter Weller (though Weller's face is used in stock footage/CGI shots). Rip Torn lobs in playing the same sleazy CEO character he has played nine hundred times before. Mako (the voice of Samurai Jack) appears as the new boss (same as the old boss). CCH Pounder comes in as the local resident with balls enough to take on the man. Jill Henessy stands out as Robo's mechanic, and Stephen Root shows he should never again try to play the Paul Reiser role from Aliens.

"I am now authorized to... be loyal as a puppy."

It's a real jumble of silliness with moments of actual intellect, but you can totally see where Frank Miller's script was rewritten by others. Some scenes are every bit as good as those in the original film, while others are so lame that you want slap your forehead. New characters brought in to push the story along (such as a young girl named Nikko who somehow knows how to reprogram a Robocop within seconds of looking at it) are nothing short of awful. Cliched subplots involving a freedom fighter who works for the other side are about as predictable as having a nightmare after eating a banana at two in the morning. And a tacked on sub-plot involving a ninja-bot just has to be laughed at to be believed.

No, it's not a good movie. In fact, it's really quite awful, to be honest. But as time has rolled on by, the 'look how far they've come' cast, the few moments of honest humor and the just plain schlock of it all make Robocop 3 an okay way to spend a buck on a week rental. Just be sure to turn it off before the entirely stupid last ten minutes, which is so ridiculous that it surely stopped the franchise cold all by itself.

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originally posted: 06/19/04 09:43:53
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