"'What are you looking at?' 'Your leg...I'd like to break it.'"
Bavmorda is the evilest bitch in Hollywood. And this was before Val Kilmer was a butt! Yay! AND... *Most* importantly, MIDGETS!Midgets midgets midgets everywhere! Midgets kick so much ass. Especially in this movie. We ain't talkin wimpy munchkins here. No sir. We're talkin magical, tough-as-nails hero midgets from another land!
And this movie gets even better than that. See, you actually LIKE Val Kilmer! You think I'm lying, and I don't blame you! It's unbelievable.
Summary: In the royal palace, a baby is born with a special marking. Evil Bavmorda orders her killed, for she is the princess, the only one capable of dethrowning her. But instead a maid sets the baby free, down a river. Yes, very biblical, but what great fairy tale isn't, at it's core? The baby is saved by Willow, a midget magician in training. The village decides the baby must be returned to her people (Tall people don't mix with midgets in this world, apparently. Their loss!) So after he leaves the village, he meets two fairies (not like that) and Val Kilmer. Together they set out to restore the princess baby while protecting her from bavmorda, but Val is really only in it to get away, cause he's a prisoner. But really he just wants to get wit Joanne Whalley, Bavmorda's daughter. (as an aside, he only really started to piss me off once he left her. She was too good for his sorry batass anyways)
I don't think I ruin anything by saying the ending is a happy one.
As fantasy adventure goes, this movie ranks very high. Comedy, adventure, old wise witches, villans, heroes, the bad boy who turns good, the damsel in distress. And monsters with two heads.I love magic. And this has plenty. It's a wonderful escapist movie that is tons of fun. It's a good snuggle movie. 4 stars.
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