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Shawn Anderson is the founder of the Mesa Frozen Entree Enthusiasts Club. And no, Shawn's not the only member. This is a group comprised of amazing dorks, each of whom await the new Swanson releases as if they were waiting in line for the newest Star Wars action figures. That these idiots would actually collect frozen entrees and also congregate to discuss their ridiculous hobby...is kind of the point of the parody. Never Been Thawed is a knowing poke in the chops to every sort of obsessive under the sun, be their addiction Star Trek, comic books, Lord of the Rings or hardcore pornography.

The fun is more in the collecting than in the item, I suppose, and Never Been Thawed nails its targets with hilarious accuracy. Watch as Shawn reveals his one-bedroom apartment - which is populated by the eight stand-alone freezers needed to keep his prized collection ever-frozen. These dorks toss around the term "NBT" as a badge of honor, as only the permanently frozen items are worthy of adulation. They Oooh and Aaah over the new Banquet line, they snipe and gripe over packaging designs, they tentatively start to organize their own Frozen Entree Convention...with amusingly inept results.

Over-devoted fanboyism might seem a flimsy premise on which to hang an entire feature; director Sean Anders solves this problem by delivering a handful of clever plot divergences and about a dozen well-constructed (and exceedinly well-realized) characters. Plus there's a healthy dosage of raunch-laden gags of the shock-value variety; fortunately they're consistently very funny and Anders keeps a crafty balance between satire and slapstick. The 'quietly amusing' gags are punctuated by a barrage of profanity or something equally outlandish, resulting in a flick that's funny on a variety of levels. Pretty impressive.

Just when the main plot needs a break we're introduced to Frozen Food Enthusiast / Abstinence Counsellor Shelly Toue, a meek and mild woman who adores Shawn and spends her hours working on the Frozen Entrees Website. Then we get Frozen Food Enthusiast / Ex-Homosexual Fireman Scott Baxter, a character who had me laughing at about 90% of his appearances. The harsh and obscenely bizarre icing on the cake comes in the form of Chris, who is Shawn's deaf and earth-shatteringly vulgar little brother. I needed my remote for the 'rewind' experience thanks to Chris.

Oh, and there's a subplot involving Christian Rockers that must be seen to be believed. Inspired comedy material here...

If I were to label Never Been Thawed as joyously non-PC, then it's meant as a big compliment. But more important than its brazen and ballsy material is the simple fact that the schtick is funny. Never underestimate the power of good material, and budget (or lack thereof) be damned.

Never Been Thawed is a great little no-budget indie comedy, the sort of flick that should be met with knowing peals of appreciative laughter at every film festival it will inevitably visit. Eventually a DVD distributor will give NBT a shot, and I bet they'll be pleasantly surprised by the results. At the very least, Never Been Thawed marks the arrival of a few VERY funny young filmmakers, and ones that should inevitably find a lot of new fans once this inspired little farce hits the circuit.

Everyone reading this review is either a Geek or a good friend of what could be considered a Geek. Either way you'll find big laughs here. Movies like this put the big-budget nine-screenwriters studio-comedy crap to shame.

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originally posted: 03/30/04 17:34:50
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